Go ahead, fuck it up.

It’s raining for what feels like the first time in months. It’s been an odd day, of course I’ve been a little lazy. I’ve been really uptight with things lately and haven’t spent a night off the farm since before Dad went to Oregon, so I took last night to just chill. Thanks Joe, for dinner and helping me simmer down a little. The day kinda continued in that vein, watching a movie while working on various writing projects. Then Dad and I got to talk and I’m finally not going to bed mad, just a little brooding, about agriculture, about writing. I’ve spent a lot of time with Luke lately, a character who has become demanding after waiting nearly twelve years for me to tell his story. I think I might have to tools to do that now. The plot in particular has caused me to search for a whole new bag of writer’s tricks. Luke himself has always intrigued me, a grandfather and his grandson in a unique situation. And Luke is not your typical grandfather at only 47, neither is Luke’s father, Chase, in his late 60s. It’s taken a long time to find my way through their story, to mire through the plot and try to add tension. Just because I love my characters doesn’t mean anyone else will be satisfied with hanging out and having a beer and a smoky treat with them unless fire breathing dog monsters are attacking and the reader feels Luke’s fear that he will lose his grandson to the mad wizard as he already lost his lover and daughter. I’m not yet either, but I’m getting closer. I’m trying to subscribe to the attitude I use with training horses: listen to everyone and their methods, then decide what works for you and this horse at that particular moment in time. Don’t be afraid to change it up and try something else. The worst that can happen is that you fuck it up. At least you tried.